Panic Switch
by Vindicata
Summary: Waking up in a hospital is scary. Finding out you're there because someone tried to kill you is scarier. Not remembering is scariest. All Bella knows is that someone with green eyes saved her, and she needs to find that someone. AU/AH **ON HIATUS**
1. Chapter 1

**Summary: **Waking up in a hospital is scary. Finding out you're there because someone tried to kill you is scarier. Not remembering is scariest. All Bella knows is that someone with green eyes saved her, and she needs to find that someone. AU/AH

**A/N: **The prologue is written in present tense and the rest of the chapter is in past tense. This is intentional. Inspiration music for this story is "Panic Switch" by Silversun Pickups.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Twilight, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.

**Prologue**

Something smashes. My eyes fly to the bottle of beer that just exploded next to my head, then back to the form looming before me.

That's when reality snaps back in.

Screaming. Things breaking. The smell of blood. Unbelievable pain.

_I need to get out._

He turns away and begins ripping apart a bookshelf. I spy my escape: the front door is only a few feet away. I struggle to my feet, biting back a scream from the pain, and stumble to the door. He doesn't notice.

The locks obey my clumsy hands and I slip into the hallway. _Stairs... Stairs…_ I almost cry for joy at the sight of the few steps leading down to the building's entrance. My body has become numb, and all I can hear is the chanting my head: _escape, I need to escape_. But in my hurry I stumble over the last step and catch myself against a wall. Pain rips through my left wrist and I gasp. A split second later he roars.

I shove myself off the wall and fly out of the building. A part of me is confused, I shouldn't be able to move, let alone walk. I shake my head and look around as I manage a limping run. Why is there no one on the street? He is getting closer; his anger makes him slow but not slow enough.

A flash of silver. There's a car at the red light.

" Help me." I want to say, but it only comes out as a strangled whisper. Another growl erupts on the street behind me and for a moment all hope disappears.

_I'm going to die._

"—the car!"

My head snaps up. Someone is yelling.

"Get in the car! Hurry!"

The roaring is louder. Closer.

_He's coming. Escape. Escape!_

My hands fumble with the door handle, I feel time running out.

_Hurry._

"Hurry!"

Tears blind my eyes. I don't want to die.

The latch opens, I tumble in the car and it speeds off. There's roaring in the distance, but I let out the breath I hadn't known I was holding. Pain rips through me once again and a whimper escapes.

"Hold on, I'm taking you to the hospital."

My head rolls to the side to look at the driver. Green eyes. I feel reality start to fade.

"Stay with me!"

_I'm safe…_

"Stay with me!"

Green eyes accompany me into the darkness.

**Panic Switch**

Chapter 1

The first thing I noticed was the beeping, pulling me from the darkness. I felt so heavy. My eyelids were too heavy to open, my lips to heavy to move, my chest too heavy to rise— Then there was the choking. My body gasped and spasmed around something in my throat, but I couldn't lift my hands or open my eyes, I was trapped and choking.

It felt like forever before the obstruction was quickly pulled from my throat and out of my mouth. I gasped in a large breath then immediately started coughing. A soothing hand placed itself on my shoulder.

"Choking is natural. It just means you're breathing on your own again." The voice, like the hand, was kind. I suddenly had a desire to see the person they were connected to. My eyelids, however, seemed to have forgotten how to move and it took a few moments of arguing before they fluttered open.

The room was dim, making it easy for my eyes to adjust. I looked to my right, at the person—the woman—who had saved me from choking to death. She was middle aged with a short bob of mouse brown hair and warm brown eyes that were hidden behind silver glasses. Her eyes were youthful and her smile was warm.

"Ah, there you are. Can you see me dear?" I nodded mutedly and glanced at what she was pulling out of a cabinet. Cautiously she lifted it up towards my face: a long thin clear tube with two small tubes coming off. _Oxygen_, I recalled and relaxed as the woman placed the tube under my nose and tucked the ends behind my ears.

"There we go. Is that better?" I nodded again, glad for it. The oxygen made me feel more awake. "You have beautiful eyes dear. A very deep brown. The other ladies will be so disappointed that I won the bet. I just had this feeling they were brown."

_The other ladies? A bet? _My mind swam with confusion at her words. I looked around the room again, this time paying more attention. There were important and strange machines surrounding me, an uncomfortable looking plastic chair in the corner, and a bland shade of beige covered every surface of the room. My stomach sunk with recognition, but I needed to be sure. My lips didn't feel as heavy as they once were, but my mouth felt crusty and hard to open.

"Where—" My voice was deep and very rough. I swallowed. "Where… am I?" I finally managed. Amusement flashed in the woman's eyes before kindness, and pity, returned.

"You don't remember? You're in the hospital—" Panic filled me. _I can't be here,_ my mind screamed, _I need to get out!_ My vision spun and I shut my eyes tight, trying to beat back the fear that was causing me to convulse. The beeping in the background became frantic and my breaths came as short gasps.

"Shhhh… shh shh shh shhhhh…" Hands were on either side of my face, smoothing my hair, stroking my cheeks. My eyes snapped open and locked onto the woman's grey ones.

"It's okay honey, you're safe... no one can get you here… no one can get you… you're safe." I felt myself slowly calm as her words sunk in.

"Safe?"

"Yes dear. We have someone guarding your door. No one can come in here but the doctor and myself."

_Safe._ Something about that word triggered a memory, but I couldn't remember why or what it was. _Safe…_ I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. When I opened them again I felt calm. Relief spread across the woman's face and she smiled again. She opened her mouth to say something, but a knock at the door cut her off, she gave me an apologetic smile.

"Let me go see who that is, probably just the doctor making sure you're alright, but I can tell him you're asleep if you want." I nodded meekly and closed my eyes, trying to appear asleep. I could hear her move across the room and open the door quickly then close it again. She must've stepped out because I didn't hear anything for several minutes. The door opened again and I tensed, only to relax at the sound of her footsteps. I blinked my eyes open and followed her form as she moved back to my side.

"That was just Dr. Hale, he was alerted when your heart monitor sped up. I told him that everything was alright, you had started breathing on your own and needed the tube removed," she explained. I didn't recognize the doctor's name, but felt a little nervous that it was a man. I wasn't sure why I felt that way though. "How are you feeling right now, dear?"

"Okay," my voice was stronger than it had been before. "I feel kinda gross… and maybe a little hungry. What happened? Why am I here?"

"I think it would be better if Dr. Hale explained, he wants to speak to you anyways." My brow furrowed, _why can't she tell me?_ I wanted to sit up so I could talk properly and not feel so lame. I struggled a moment before the woman realized what I was doing and showed me the button to make the bed lift. Once I was upright and comfortable she continued.

"Why don't I get you something to eat while you talk to the doctor?" she asked. I felt myself panic slightly at the thought of being alone with the doctor, she picked up on it. "Unless you are uncomfortable with that, I can stay in the room with you if you want."

Her worry bothered me, I couldn't figure out why I had reacted like I did. _He's a doctor,_ I chided myself mentally, _you're perfectly safe around him._ I swallowed and put on a small smile to reassure the woman.

"No, I'll be fine. I'm just a little worried about what he's going to tell me. No worries."

"If you're sure…" she paused, "What would you like to eat? Oh, I know! How about hot soup and some chocolate pudding?" I nodded and smiled broadly; she was so kind. "Alright then, I'll go get that for you and I'll send the doctor in, okay?"

"Okay."

She disappeared from the room once again and I became nervous, thinking of the coming talk with the doctor. _Don't be ridiculous, everything's going to be fine._ I smiled grimly as I squashed my nerves down. I glanced around the room, unsure what to do while I waited, then noticed the window on the right wall. I had been so focused on the woman I hadn't even realized it was there. It was dark but I could see the twinkling lights of the city in the distance.The sky was a clear deep blue; I could even see a few stars.

Knock. Knock. I turned my head back to the door to see a blond head pop in. The man's face was inquistive and caring, and I could see a bit of his white coat at his collar. _This must be the doctor,_ I thought.

"Come in," I squeaked. I chastised myself for sounding so scared and tried to look friendly as the doctor strode in. He grabbed the chair from the corned and brought it over to the side of my bed. Standing, he must have been over six feet, but sitting down our eyes were level. His hair just grazed the top of his cheekbones and was dirty blonde, but not in a bad way. There were a few light scars, one on his forehead, one by his right eye, another on his jaw, and his nose was ever so slightly crooked. His eyes were a very clear ice blue, watching me as I inspected him. _So handsome._ I blushed and averted my gaze.

"Hello, my name is Dr. Hale," he began, "I'm your attending. I would like to ask you a few questions." His voice was deep and soothing. I found myself looking back at his face, blushing but keeping my eyes steady. I nodded, but was slightly confused, _shouldn't I be the one with the questions?_ "Let's start of with your name."

"My name?" my voice quivered with panic.

"When you were admitted you were unconscious and had no identification. You've been charted as 'Jane Doe' until now," he paused, glancing away, when he looked back he seemed almost embarrassed, "I find it a little strange to address you as Miss Jane Doe. You don't seem like a Jane to me."

I giggled a little at his confession, blushing harder when I realized I was laughing at my doctor, but he only smiled. Amusement danced in his eyes and I felt relaxed in his presence.

"My name's Isabella Swan. You can call me Bella." I said, smiling. He smiled back.

"Very nice to meet you Bella. It's a relief to have a name to put with a face. You can call me Jasper." I giggled again before becoming more serious.

"So… I was unconscious when I came in? What happened? How did I get here?" I asked, my brow furrowed with concentration. It was all so strange.

"You were brought in by one of my colleagues, he found you wandering down a street, in a bad condition, and brought you here. You fell unconscious on the way over." I tried to remember anything from then, but I couldn't. Something he said worried me though.

"In a bad condition?" It was his turn to look worried and somewhat nervous. He was quiet for a moment, and I could almost see him searching for the words. It made me nervous, I swallowed hard.

"Bella, when you were brought in you seemed to have been beaten severely. There were numerous lacerations and deep gashes on your body, along with extensive bruising. Your clothes were ripped and torn, your hair was sheared oddly and small chunks were missing. You had a sprained ankle, glass in your hands, knees, and feet. Your wrist was broken. You had three broken ribs, one of which had punctured your right lung. You also had a decent concussion. There was also… lacerations on your thighs and in your vagina…." He trailed off and looked down at his hands.

It took a moment for his words to sink in. I looked down at myself, why hadn't I done that earlier?! There was a deep blue cast on my left wrist and my right hand was bandaged, how had I not seen that? I used my good hand to touch my face, feeling the gauze on my cheek and forehead; it hurt to touch the back of my head. My eyes watered when I accidentally hid a spot where a chunk had been torn out. I pulled the blanket away from the rest of my body, my body crying in pain at the movement. Bruises and cuts littered my legs, my ankle was wrapped, my eyes trailed up towards my… Tears stung in my eyes and I looked away, pulling the blanket back over me. My eyes caught Jasper's; he wasn't looking at me with pity, but with understanding and empathy. That small fact gave me strength. I blinked back my tears and turned to him bravely.

"How… was I still alive?" I refused to let my fear betray me. He looked at me thoughtfully for a moment before responding.

"I can attribute it only to your intense will to live. You escaped a dangerous situation and were walking despite incredible injuries. You are extremely brave and strong, Bella," His eyes shone with sincerity, causing me to bite back my cry of denial. "But I need to ask you, do you remember anything from that night?"

He looked at me earnestly, and I looked at my hands, trying to remember. I couldn't, it was a blank. I looked at Jasper and shook my head, feeling very lost and confused. He sighed with disappointment.

"I was hoping that you would have some memory for the sole reason of protecting you. However, a part of me is relieved you don't remember, it would be tough to deal with right now. Temporary memory loss is very common with victims of a traumatic event. When something happens that is hard for the mind to comprehend, it shuts down and the memory becomes blocked. Sometimes forever, sometimes for only a short while. Unfortunately, concussions also lead to memory loss so the chances of you remembering were very slim to begin with." I was relieved to know that it was okay that I couldn't remember, but it frustrated me. Whatever happened kept making me react in strange ways and I wanted to know why.

"So I was assaulted?" I searched his face for answers. He looked at me sadly.

"Yes, we believe so. Probably by someone you know, as you were in what looked to be pajamas at the time." A chill ran down my spine. _Someone I knew did this to me…_ I sat there in stunned silence.

"How long have I been here?" I asked suddenly. The thought had only just occurred to me.

"About three days, you've been unconscious the whole time." Jasper said, his voice was soft, and strained. He seemed to be having as hard of time talking about this, as I was having just listening. There was a soft knock at the door and we both turned to it. He stood up to go.

"Um, Jasper?" He turned to me, surprised.

"Yes?"

"Would you happen to know," I muttered, my cheeks burning up, "the name of the woman who was with me before?" He chuckled.

"Her name is Caroline Weber, if you need anything just ask her."

"Oh… And Jasper?" He looked at me curiously. "Thank you for saving my life." He smiled and nodded his head, making his way to the door. He paused for a moment then looked back at me once more, suddenly very serious.

"I couldn't have done it without you, Bella." And with that he was out the door. A moment later Mrs. Weber came in with a tray of steaming food and a smile on her face.

"Here you go dear! I stole the last chocolate pudding just for you!" She gave me a conspiratory wink and set the tray down on a table that swung over the bed so I could eat. The food smelled good, surprisingly, and I dug in right away. I didn't realize how hungry I was. While I ate Mrs. Weber made notes on my chart and removed a couple of machines from the room, humming softly the whole time.

"Well dear, I'll let you finish your meal while I go check on a few things. I'll pick up the tray later." She smiled, and I smiled back over my pudding. "Oh, and you should try and get some rest." Mrs. Weber started to leave the room but I felt a need to tell her something.

"Wait!" She paused and turned back, worried. I blushed and said softly, "My name's Bella." Mrs. Weber smiled broadly at me.

"Sleep well, Bella. Remember, you're safe here." And she was gone.

I felt it again, that memory that kept dancing just out of reach. I couldn't put a finger on what was tugging at my subconscious, and it bothered me. I pushed the table to the side and lowered my bed so I could get some sleep. I pulled the blanket up to my chin and closed my eyes. As the minutes ticked by, I felt myself start to drift off.

Sometime in the night I woke up to a noise, scared and alone. It took me a minute to remember where I was and relax again. I laughed at myself.

"Silly me, I'm safe." I closed my eyes again.

_I'm safe…_

The last thing I remember before falling asleep is remembering from somewhere a pair of very green eyes with a small ring of gold right around the pupils. A pair of green eyes that made me feel very… safe.

**A/N:** Who is her attacker? Does anyone know? Hmmm?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary: **Waking up in a hospital is scary. Finding out you're there because someone tried to kill you is scarier. Not remembering is scariest. All Bella knows is that someone with green eyes saved her, and she needs to find that someone. AU/AH

**Recap: **Bella wakes in a hospital and finds out that she has been unconscious for three days after a brutal assault.

**A/N: **A few more familiar faces show up in this chapter as Bella tries to deal with her current situation. Also, for reference, Temazepam is a tranquilizer/sedative.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Twilight, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.

**Panic Switch**

Chapter 2

As the sun rose, I awoke. I just lay there for a few minutes, watching the pink of the sky fade into gold and then the soft blue of morning. _It will be sunny today…_ I thought. The thought sun was nice... I tried to swing my legs over the side of the bed. A sharp pain tore through my chest and abdomen. I gasped falling back against the pillow. As the pain slowly faded, everything came rushing back.

_I'm in the hospital… Someone attacked me…_ Tears stung in my eyes, why would someone do this?

_Stop it, _I thought angrily, _stop pitying yourself!_ I sighed and rubbed away the tears with the back of my hand. My stomach rumbled; sighing I pressed the 'call nurse' button.

"Hello dear!" Mrs. Weber called as she bustled in. I smiled and mumbled a weak 'Good Morning'. "I thought you might be a little hungry so I brought you some breakfast!" She brought the tray over; the smell of eggs and sausage hit me hard. My stomach complained again. As Mrs. Weber grinned. I hung my head and started in on my eggs with a blush.

"How did you sleep last night, Bella?" she asked as she moved about, checking machines and marking my chart.

"I slept alright." I mumbled. It was embarrassing to be so weak.

"That's good to hear. I was a little worried that you would have trouble sleeping after the doctor's news." I shook my head and sipped some orange juice. "Oh look! It's sunny out. Let me open that shade more and get some light in here." Mrs. Weber pulled a cord in the corner and suddenly the room was filled with light. I turned my head away and blinked a few times.

"Ahh, much better." I couldn't help smiling with her, the sun felt amazing. When I looked back to my nearly empty tray I almost gasped. In the morning light I could clearly see the cuts and bruises on my arms. The worst looking one was on my right arm and appeared to be several bands of purplish black. I tried to ignore the fear that curled in the pit of my stomach. I placed my hand over the bruises. That's when I realized what the bands were caused by: fingers. Large fingers and a large hand. A man's hand.

"—what do you think?" I looked up to see Mrs. Weber looking at me, a question hanging. I shoved my arm under the blanket.

"I'm sorry… I wasn't paying attention." She just laughed.

"I was letting you know that you will be having some visitors today."

"Visitors?"

"Mmhmm. A detective is coming down from the police department to talk to you and Dr. Cullen will be here later to discuss some things." It took a moment to comprehend what she was saying.

"The police?!" I was starting to hyperventilate. Mrs. Weber rushed over and brushed my hair from my face.

"Yes dear. It's hospital policy that whenever someone comes in with assault wounds, the police are called." I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath. "It's a female detective, of course, Dr. Hale will also be present, and myself if that helps."

I didn't say anything; I just bowed my head and blinked away the moisture in my eyes. It was frustrating to feel so helpless. Even more so to feel terrified all the time without knowing why. I was safe here, that much I knew, but I couldn't keep my heart from jumping into my throat every time someone new showed up.

_This is stupid. Stop acting like a little girl._ When I lifted my head to look back at Mrs. Weber, I tried to be strong. She looked so worried about me already. She patted my hand and gave me a soft smile.

"I'm so proud of you for being so brave." She moved to the other side of my bed and picked up the tray, "Now, is there anythingelse you need right now?" I opened my mouth to say no, but then realized how atrocious my breath must be. I slapped a hand over my mouth.

"Could I brush my teeth?" I asked through my fingers. Mrs. Weber laughed. I felt myself blush so hard, I was sure I had turned into a giant tomato. She nodded, taking the tray from my room, and returning a few minutes later with everything I would need to brush my teeth in my bed—including a little bucket to spit in. After I brushed my teeth, Mrs. Weber informed me that Dr. Hale and the detective would come around lunchtime.

"You should get some rest in the meantime," she said before leaving, shutting off the lights in the process. I wanted to think about what would happen when they got here but I suddenly felt very tired. I yawned and closed my eyes.

_There will plenty of time to think later…_

***

When I woke up again, there were voices outside my door. They weren't particularly loud, but I could tell they were arguing. Uncomfortable, I pressed the 'call nurse' button to alert them I was awake. The voices stopped and Mrs. Weber stuck her head in.

"Glad to see you're awake dear. Your visitors are here. Would you like me to bring you some lunch while you speak to them?"

"Yes please."

"I'll go get you lunch. They'll be here in a moment." I nodded and raised my bed. I didn't think I would have much of an appetite, but food was a welcome distraction. The door opened, presenting a stressed-looking Dr. Hale and a tall, beautiful woman. The woman closed the door and brought the chair over to sit by my side.

"Hello Bella, my name is Rosalie." She extended her hand. I took it awkwardly. She had a French manicure. I blushed realizing I had been staring at her hand. The woman, Rosalie, was extremely beautiful. Her long blond hair was pulled away from her face, revealing her exquisite features.

Her clothes appeared to be expensive as well. She wore jeans, _designer probably_ I thought to myself, with a red v-neck sweater and a well cut leather jacket over top. She looked every inch a model, but the badge hanging around her neck said otherwise. By the time I looked back at her face, I realized her ice blue eyes had been watching me carefully. I blushed harder, but she smiled warmly.

"How are you felling today, Bella?" Dr. Hale asked from his position in the corner.

"I'm feeling alright. A little overwhelmed and very tired of being stuck in a bed." I griped, frowning at my blankets. They laughed. Rosalie had just opened her mouth to speak when there was a small knock at the door; a moment later Mrs. Weber appeared, tray in hand.

"Don't mind me, I've just got the food." I smiled, relieved to have her with me. After placing the tray down before me, Mrs. Weber sat down in a chair I hadn't noticed her bring in. On the tray there was a sandwich, _egg salad_, I smiled, _my favorite._ There was also a cup of red jello and a bottle of water.

"Bella, why don't you start eating while we get you up to speed," Rosalie said. I nodded and picked up my sandwich, taking a small bite. "Let's see…" She pulled a notebook out of her leather briefcase and glanced at a page. "You were brought in to the emergency room around 11:30 PM on the 14th. The department was called and I came over to take pictures for evidence before you went into surgery. Jasper went over your injuries, correct?" I nodded, blushing from the thought of the pictures.

"After that you were unconscious for three days. You woke up yesterday evening around 10 o'clock. Today is the 18th.Does this sound right?" Dr. Hale and Mrs. Weber nodded. They must have noticed my discomfort because Mrs. Weber squeezed my left hand gently. Rosalie smiled at me reassuringly. "Other than that, we know nothing. We were hoping you could answer some questions. Is that alright?"

"Okay." My voice cracked a little. I grabbed my water bottle and took a gulp.

"Alright, let's start off with your full name."

"Isabella Marie Swan." I sounded a little less anemic this time.

"Where were you born?"

"Forks, Washington." Some surprise flashed in Mrs. Weber's voice. _I'll ask her later._

"Birthday?"

"September 13th, 1985."

"Friday the 13th?" Rosalie asked with a smile. I felt my face flame up and nodded. The three of them shared a small chuckle.

"Current address?" I frowned, trying to remember.

"177 Long Street, apartment 201." Dr. Hale took a sharp breath, everyone looked at him.

"She was picked up on the corner of 3rd and Long." He said tensely, looking at Rosalie. She nodded and whipped out her phone. After hitting a button she strode over to the door, muttering fiercely.

"What's going on?" I asked, nervous. Dr. Hale looked at me sadly.

"You were found after the assault very close to your apartment," he said quietly. Suddenly it all made sense.

"So it happened there?" My voice broke at the end and Mrs. Weber squeezed my hand. He nodded. Rosalie snapped her phone, sitting back down again.

"I sent a couple of guys over to your apartment to check it out."

"Won't they need a warrant?" Dr. Hale asked.

"Not if my hunch is correct."

"Your hunch?" Mrs. Weber was the one to ask this time. Rosalie grimaced and looked me in the eyes.

"Based on your injuries when you came in, I'm pretty sure you lost a fair amount of blood. If there's any blood around or leading to your apartment they'll have probable cause, no warrant needed." I shivered at the thought.

"Do you need a blanket Bella?" Mrs.Weber asked. I shook my head no, still looking at Rosalie.

"Now Bella, I need to know what you remember." I swallowed hard and nodded.

"The last thing I remember was going to bed that night." Rosalie jotted something on her notes.

"Do you know approximately what time that was?" I closed my eyes and thought back.

"Around 9 o'clock. I had pulled an all-nighter studying for my last final the night before."

"Were you expecting anyone that night?" I shook my head.

"I went out for drinks earlier that afternoon with friends to celebrate the end of finals, they wanted me to come dancing with them but I called it a night."

"Does anyone else have a key to your apartment?"

"No one other than my landlord." Rosalie frowned.

"Bella, do you remember anyone being upset with you? Or if anyone had expressed wanting to cause you harm?" My mind swum, and everything became a blur. Did someone want to hurt me? Why would they do something like this?

_Why?_

Arms were around me, rocking me back and forth. I could feel my body shaking with sobs but my mind felt numb.

_Why?_

I wanted to scream, I wanted to shake them and demand why someone would do this to me. My body convulsed and I vaguely registered that I was screaming.

_Why?_

"Sedate her before she hurts herself!"

_Why?_

I felt myself thrash harder against the tranquilizer that was moving through my system. 'No, I need to know why' I wanted to say but it only came out as a moan.

The darkness was coming.

_Why?_

And then I was gone.

***

It was like some sort of awful déjà vu. I could hear the beeping. My body felt like lead. But this time there was no choking. And I wasn't alone.

There was a small person in the corner, leaning over some papers on which they were writing, humming and slightly bobbing their black head. My body tensed and the beeping sped up. The black head whipped up and the small person came over quickly. It was a girl—no, a woman, she was very short, probably even shorter than me. She dragged the chair over and smiled at me.

"Hi, I'm Alice!" Her voice was light and feminine. Strangely, I felt myself relax. "You must be Bella." She had such a large smile on her face; I couldn't help but give a small smile back.

"Yes." I didn't think it was possible, but her smile seemed to have grown.

"It's nice to meet the girl Jazz and Rose were fighting about," she chirped. "I came by earlier and they were having world war three over what to do with you. Jazz was yelling at Rose for pushing you too hard. And she was screaming that they needed to work fast to catch the creep that did this to you. I quote: 'We're never going to learn anything if you keep acting like the god damned angel of temazepam!'" Alice giggled at my shocked face.

"Jazz? Do you mean… Dr. Hale?"

"Yep!" She paused " I guess I should introduce myself properly," she straightened up and put on a serious face. "I'm Dr. Cullen, you may call me Alice." She looked so serious, I couldn't help but laugh. Alice tried to give me a stern look, but a moment later she burst into laughter too. It wasn't really that funny, but we kept laughing for a good while. By the time we had calmed down to sporadic giggles, tears were running down my face. Alice handed me a tissue and I wiped away the moisture.

"Thank you, Alice," I said, serious again, "that felt good. This is the first time I've felt like me since waking up." I couldn't help the blush that crept up my cheeks. She smiled.

"You know what?"

"What?"

"I was sent here to talk to you, psychiatrist to trauma victim," I wasn't entirely surprised by that, "but what I think you really need is a friend." This, however, did surprise me and I sat there with a dumb look on my face, head cocked a little to the side.

"I'm thinking you're a fairly shy and private person. You usually only rely on yourself when things happen. So I think you probably don't need professional help. You just need someone you can trust and talk to: a friend." I was shocked, after only a few minutes with me, Alice had me pegged.

"Oh, don't give me that look," she said, "I'm a psychiatrist, I'm supposed to be able to do that." She looked so proud of herself. I started to giggle again. She flashed me a triumphant smile. "So Bella, friends?" She stuck out a hand. I took it with a smile.

"Friends." I agreed.

"Alright then, I believe you need to get out of this room. It's sunny out, let's get a tan."

"But there's someone guarding my door."

"Don't worry about that. Now," she reached down and pulled a pile of fabric out of a bag, "here are some scrubs. I'm going to grab a wheelchair and I'll be right back to help you change." She frowned. "And I'll have Caroline take that IV out, you shouldn't need it anymore."

Alice swept out of the room and I gingerly picked up the scrubs. Out of the folds tumbled a cotton sports bra and underwear. I blushed, but was relieved. The door suddenly opened and Mrs. Weber came in, followed by Alice pushing a wheelchair. My cheeks flamed when I realized I was sitting there with a pair of underwear in my hands.

Neither of them seemed to care though. Mrs. Weber came over and removed the IV and catheter. I turned my head away as it came out; I hated needles. Meanwhile, Alice was shutting off the heart monitor and removing the 'grippy' from my finger. I was surprised by how serious they were, until I saw the gleam in Alice's eye as she winked to Mrs. Weber, who smiled back conspiratorially.

"Alright, now for the difficult part. We're going to help you change Bella, try not to feel embarrassed." I nodded, a little apprehensive at them seeing me naked. But once again, they didn't seem to mind at all. Mrs. Weber untied my hospital gown and helped me put on the sports bra. It hurt to lift my harms and my torso was bruised and sore, but the bra was comfortable and soft. Over top went the dark blue scrub shirt. I tried not to blush when Alice helped with the underwear and pants; it hurt to bend over so I didn't really have a choice. Finally I was dressed. It felt wonderfully human to be in real clothes again.

"Time to get you out of that bed!" Alice chirped. She lowered the left rail and moved the wheelchair next to the side of my bed. "Alright Bella, I need you to scoot your butt over this way and let your legs hang over the edge." I used my right arm to help as I began to scoot. Each movement hurt, but I refused to show my pain. I was at the edge moments later, I smiled, proud of myself.

"Great!" Alice said, " Now, I'm going to help you into the chair. You're going to put your left arm over my shoulders and I'm going to lift from your waist and knees. Use your arm to help lift, okay?" I nodded. "On three. One, two… three!" I was suddenly in the air then just as quick I was sitting in the wheelchair. I grinned and Alice and I shared a little high-five.

"Oh, we're missing something!" Mrs. Weber said suddenly. I gaze her a confused look. From Alice's bag, she procured a pair of socks and a pair of slip on Keds. "We don't want your toes to get cold." She said cheerfully. Mrs. Weber and Alice each took a foot. After she was done, Alice handed me a pair of sunglasses.

"It's a disguise," she giggled, "plus it's sunny out." I felt a little ridiculous wearing sunglasses indoors, but at the same time, I was exhilarated. "Now we're ready to go!" Mrs. Weber opened the door and Alice pushed me out into the hallway.

"Dr. Alice, what's going on here?" A voice asked, making me jump. An older man sat to the left of the doorway, holding a book and giving Alice 'the look'. She tittered.

"I'm taking Bella out for a stroll in the sunshine, John." She said cheerfully. "Bella, this is John. John, Bella." I stuck out my hand with a slight smile.

"Nice to meet you John," I said. John took my hand and kissed my knuckles.

"It is my greatest honor to meet the fair princess who was saved from the dragon." I blushed at his words and Alice and Mrs. Weber laughed.

"John likes his share of fairytales and romances. He's always reading some silly story or another." Mrs. Weber said with a laugh. John looked offended.

"It's okay John, I'm a sucker for the classic romances. Pride and Prejudice is my favorite," I said, feeling sorry for the man. He gave me a broad smile.

"Now John, we need to get going. We're burning daylight." Alice said.

"Dr. Alice you can't take her out there. I'm supposed to be protecting her."

"But," I spoke up, "if someone was looking for me, they would know I wouldn't be allowed out of my room and would look for me here. So actually, taking a walk with Alice would be the safer route." Alice clapped her hands in glee.

"You can't argue with her logic, John." She leaned down and said to me, in a softer voice, "I _knew_ we'd be the best of friends!"

"Well…" John conceded, "If you're going to take her out there then she's going to need a jacket." With a grin he grabbed his heavy leather coat and wrapped it around me. "Don't have her out there too long, if she gets a cold Dr. Jasper will have my head!" We shared a laugh. I couldn't imagine Dr. Hale hurting a sweet old man like John.

Mrs. Weber and John said their farewells and Alice began pushing me through the building. I snuggled myself into John's coat, the smell of the leather reminded me of happier times, before Charlie died.

"How are you doing pain-wise?" Alice suddenly asked. I hadn't been paying attention.

"I'm alright, I think all the excitement is helping block it out." I didn't like to admit I was in pain, but my instincts told me that if I lied, Alice wouldn't be very happy.

"Let me know if it gets worse. I have your medicine with me." I nodded. We didn't chat a whole lot on our way. Alice pointed out the different areas and departments we passed. I think she enjoyed being my tour guide. Every so often someone would stop and say hello to Alice, then inquire after me. Alice introduced me as 'Izzy', John's niece who had taken a tumble while making rounds with Alice. Her ease with telling the lie was amazing. I had to wonder how often she spirited patients out of their guarded rooms for a stroll.

I hadn't realized how huge the hospital complex was. It took at least 15 minutes and three different elevators before we arrived at the gardens. It was gorgeous outside. There were so many patients and nurses milling about that no one gave me a second glance. Alice pushed me over to a secluded area. We were surrounded by tall butterfly bushes. The air was sweet and fragrant and the sun felt glorious on my skin. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back, letting the sun warm my face.

My nose started to itch and I opened my eyes to swat away whatever was tickling me. Orange. I gasped and the orange disappeared. The monarch butterfly flew off, landing on a nearby bush. Alice giggled next to me. I turned to her, practically bouncing in my seat.

"Did you see that?!" I exclaimed. She laughed.

"Yep. But I thought for sure you would sneeze or smack the poor thing!" I gave her a disparaging look. "Your face was all scrunched up, you looked so annoyed!" She broke into laughter and I joined in a moment later. After we had calmed down, we sat there for a while, just enjoying the weather. It was peaceful and relaxing. I began to forget where I was all together until a cool breeze made a shiver.

"Bella?" I looked at Alice; she was looking at her hands. "We need to talk about what happened." Suddenly I was very cold and I pulled John's coat tighter around me.

"I know." My voice was soft.

"I'm going to ask you some questions and I want you to answer them like you're talking to a friend. Remember, there aren't any right or wrong answers, okay?" I nodded. "Do you know where you are?"

"Yes" I was a little confused at her question.

"Alright. Now, do you know how you got here?"

"I was brought in," I frowned, "because someone attacked me."

"Mmhmm. Bella, why would you let someone into your apartment late at night?"

"It happened at my apartment?" My eyes widened a little.

"Yeah, Rose said that her team had found your apartment torn apart. It looked like no one had been there since." We were quiet for a moment.

"So it really happened…" My voice was almost a whisper.

"Yes."

"A part of me thought this was all a big mistake, that I had tripped down some stairs or something. I've always been clumsy, always in and out of the emergency room…" Alice didn't say anything for a minute.

"That night… were you asleep?"

"Yes." I was no longer in the garden—I was back in my apartment, in bed.

"What happened?"

"Someone knocked on my door, no… they were pounding. It scared me… I thought it was the police… that something bad had happened…"

"Did you get up?"

"Yeah, it was so loud. I went to the door…"

"Did you look out the peephole?"

"Mhmm… but I couldn't see anything. I thought it was some kids playing around, so I opened the door…"

"Who was there?" The memory, which had been so clear, blurred, my mind began to spin. I felt a cry well up in my throat. Alice's arms were around me then, holding me, and rocking us back and forth. Tears poured down my cheeks.

_Who was there?_ My mind kept repeating the question over and over…

"Bella!" Alice's hands were on either side of my face, forcing me to look her in the eyes. "Bella, close the door, you need to close the door." I wanted to vomit. My head kept spinning.

"Close the door, Bella. You're safe!"

_Safe._

_Close the door,_ my mind echoed. Everything came to a sudden stop. The door had closed. I was fine. I was back in the gardens. Alice was looking at me intently. I took a shaky breath and focused my gaze. She smiled.

"Better?" She asked softly. I nodded slowly; something about her eyes was familiar. It wasn't the hazel… She had a strange ring of gold around the pupil. I had seen that same ring somewhere else…

Alice's phone began to buzz on the bench, surprising us. She grabbed it and walked a few feet off. Several moments later she came back, looking tense.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Our little outing has been discovered, we need to get back so I can do some damage control."

***

I was quiet on our way back to my room. Part of me dreaded going back there, but another part of me was grateful to hide there, away from the memories. Even though I didn't like to admit it, I knew I was afraid of what would come in the next few days. Even the thought of the next few hours seemed daunting. My world had turned upside down in the space of a few days…

"Uh oh." Alice's small exclamation brought me back. We were already in my hall, not that I would have known that except for Dr. Hale, Mrs. Weber, John, and Rosalie standing outside my door.

"I'm sorry but you simply cannot see her until your alibi checks out." Dr. Hale was practically shouting at a fifth person. A huge man stood with them, face bright red, looking like he was going to strangle each and every one of them.

"If you don't let me in there I'm going to smash that pretty blonde head of yours," the man growled at Dr. Hale taking a step forward. He towered over the doctor; he had to be at least 6'6".

"You're really not helping your case." Rosalie didn't seem all that concerned, mostly annoyed. I glanced at Alice's tense face, realizing she was pulling me backwards away from the hall.

"Young man, I'm not going to ask you again to step away." John was in front of the man now, puffing his chest up, but he looked old and weak in comparison.

"Don't make me hurt you old man!" The man started towards John, his hand clenched in a fist.

"No!" The word had escaped my mouth before I knew what was happening. Everyone became rigid, then the man turned to me. I could hear Alice swearing under her breath, ready to run us away.

"Bells!" There was relief in the man's eyes, he no longer looked angry. But as soon as he took a step forward, John had whipped out his tazer.

My eyes widened in alarm as the behemoth of a man came crashing down to the tiled floor. Unconscious.

*******************************

**A/N: **Now there are two men, or are they one and the same? Don't worry, it won't be long until we meet Bella's savior, but I'm sure you already know who it is.

Please review! Thanks!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary: **Waking up in a hospital is scary. Finding out you're there because someone tried to kill you is scarier. Not remembering is scariest. All Bella knows is that someone with green eyes saved her, and she needs to find that someone. AU/AH

**Recap: **Bella spends an emotional day making new friends and being spirited out of her room for a jaunt in the garden. Upon returning, she has a visitor who ends up getting tazed by John.

**A/N: **FMLA is the Family and Medical Leave Act, it protects employees from being fired should they have a family or medical emergency.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Twilight, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.

**Panic Switch**

Chapter 3

"I'm really sorry Bella." I waved off John's apology, keeping an eye on the man lying in my bed. Rosalie scoffed.

"It's his own fault, if he had just waited five more minutes, his alibi would've come through."

"Rose…" Dr. Hale's voice threatened.

"What, he's always doing stuff like this. Shoot first, talk late." She mocked and I nodded absently. It was true; he was always doing dumb things like this… The man's face scrunched up.

"He's waking up!" I said in an excited whisper. Dr. Hale and Rosalie ceased their quiet argument to watch. The man blinked open his eyes, looking around. He groaned and I giggled. His eyes met mine.

"Bella Baloney?" He slurred.

"Hey Emmie." Rosalie laughed under her breath; I shot her a dirty look.

"What the hell happened?" Emmett asked, his eyes rolling around to look at the people in the room. Confusion marred his face.

"You're in the hospital, Em." I said. He was so out of it, it worried me.

"Did I fall through the roof again? 'Cause it feels like some asshole ran over me. And then backed up and did it again and then—" I started laughing and reached over to ruffle his dark curly hair. His face was blank for a moment.

"Wait… the hospital?!" Emmett seemed to have finally realized what was going on. He tried to sit up. "Jones and Kowalski, they were talking about some Swan girl in the hospital." His eyes glazed over as he remembered. Then he was looking at me, eyes wide. "Bella, what happened? Why were they talking about you at the department?"

"I—"

"Holy shit Bella, what happened to you? Is your wrist broken again?! And your hair!" Emmett's face kept getting redder and redder with each word. I placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him.

"Emmett. Down boy. I'm fine." He looked suspicious for a moment, then relief flooded his face.

"Geez, talk about a bad case of big-brotheritis" Dr. Hale muttered. Alice smacked him.

"That's because I _am_ her big brother!" Emmett growled at him. Everyone looked confused.

"McCarty was our mother's maiden name," I explained quietly. "When he applied to the academy, we decided it would be easier with a name other than Swan." Alice gave me a questioning look. _Not right now_, I willed her to let it drop. She nodded ever so slightly before turning her attention to Emmett.

"So Emmett, you're a detective? You work with Rosalie?" She asked with a sly look.

"Sure do," he said with a grin, "'Cept she does her damnedest to make sure we don't." He laughed and I could've sworn Rosalie blushed a little.

"Really? I've never heard anything about you before, Emmett. Why's that Rose?" Dr. Hale asked with an amused look. She sputtered and blushed.

"That's because he's an idiot who never stops to think things through. That's why he's in the position he's in now!"

"Aww Rosey, I didn't know you liked me being horizontal." Emmett grinned broadly.

"Don't. Call. Me. Rosey." She spat, furious.

"So Emmett," Mrs. Weber finally spoke up, breaking the tension. "How did you end up coming here in the first place?" Emmett looked generally surprised by the question.

"Well, it had been a few days since I'd heard from Bella here, which usually meant she had managed to trip and end up in the hospital or something." I glared at him but he only shrugged. "So as I was getting ready to leave work and check on her, I heard Jones and Kowalski mention the name 'Swan' in the break room. I got the information from them and came here. After that it's a little fuzzy."

"You better not have threatened them," Rosalie growled.

"I swear I didn't!" He said, holding his hands in the air. " But could someone please explain why I'm in a hospital bed?" John looked uncomfortable.

"Well, you came to the room and demanded entrance, but when we didn't let you in, you got a little angry. So…"

"So he tazered you." Rosalie finished. "Not that I blame him."

"I'm really sorry Detective McCarty. I was just trying to protect Bella." John apologized. Emmett was quiet for a moment.

"Cool!" He suddenly exclaimed with a huge grin. "I always wondered what that would feel like!" I covered my face, trying to hide my embarrassment as Emmett started to say in a high voice: 'Don't taze me bro, don't taze me!' over and over.

"Em…" I moaned. He became very quiet. I pulled my hands away from my face to look at him. He was staring at me with an expression I couldn't place. He broke our gaze, turning to look at Dr. Hale and the others.

"Now that it's been established that I'm not a threat," there was a strange quality to his voice, "may I speak to my sister… _alone?_" Without a word the four shuffled out of the room, glancing worriedly at me over their shoulders. When the door finally closed, Emmett looked at me. He looked tortured, anxious, and very angry.

"Isabella, what the hell is going on?" Emmett's voice was low, but it shook with emotion. I stared at my hands, unable to find words to adequately explain.

"I don't know Emmett." I said finally.

"What do you mean you don't know? You look like hell!" He snapped.

"I mean I don't know Em! I can't remember!" I shot back. I felt so frustrated and defeated, hot tears ran tracks down my cheeks. With a groan, Emmett swung himself out of bed and knelt next to my wheelchair. I opened my mouth to protest, but his arms were already wrapped around me, holding me gently. He pressed his forehead against mine softly like he used to do when we were kids.

"Shh, Bells…" He murmured. "Just tell me what you know."

"I woke up yesterday, they said I was out for three days, I was brought in…" My whisper trailed off, I choked back a sob as the tears continued to flow. I hated crying in front of people, but Emmett was my brother, he would know it if I tried to hide my tears.

"You were brought in?" His voice was tentative, but I could hear the quiet fury behind his words. I nodded against his head.

"They said someone found me by my apartment. That I was beaten. That it happened at my apartment—" I sobbed softly for a moment before continuing, "They said it was someone I know." Emmett was quiet, thinking.

"Is that why I needed an alibi?" I nodded again. "I'm going to kill whoever did this to you." His voice was so serious; it scared me. My eyes snapped open. Emmett's hand was inching towards where his gun was usually holstered. I was grateful he wasn't armed today.

"Emmett, no." I sobered up and grabbed his hand. "You can't. I don't even know who it was. Besides if you go after them, you'll lose your badge. Promise me you won't do anything stupid." I said vehemently. He sighed, conflicted.

"I promise I won't. But Bella, I'm going to help with the investigation and when you get out of here, you're moving in with me."

"But—"

"Isabella Marie." My mouth shut automatically when he used his 'parental' voice. Emmett stood up and gave me a stern look. "Now I'm going to go talk to your doctor and Rosalie. And while I'm doing that you, young lady, are going to get some rest." He scooped me out of the wheelchair and deposited me back in the bed. I glared at him.

"I'm not tired, Em," I grumbled. Emmett ignored me, pulling off my shoes and tossing them in the corner. He pulled the blankets up to my chin and flashed me a grin.

"Don't fight me Bells. I've got your power of attorney." I glowered at him, his grin broadened. "I love you squirt."

"I love you too, you big brute." I mumbled and with a kiss on my head, he left. I wanted to stay up and refuse to sleep just to spite him. But the day's excitement was starting to catch up to me and my eyelids began drooping involuntarily. I tried to resist the urge to sleep at first. _If you sleep now, you'll have more energy to yell at him later_, that annoying part of mind quipped. I sighed, knowing it was true, and succumbed to my exhaustion.

***

I've always talked in my sleep. Ever since I was a child, my subconscious had been more talkative than my conscious self. I learned at a young age to avoid sleepovers, what I said in my sleep was usually embarrassing, and it's hard to apologize for something you don't remember saying in the first place.

It was something I had inherited from Renee and I hated it. But when I woke from my Emmett-induced nap, I was hopeful. Even if my conscious refused to remember my attack, my subconscious would. And it was a talker. Emmett was sitting in a chair by my bed. I looked at him, searching his eyes for the answer I needed.

"Bella…" He shook his head and I sighed, squeezing my eyes shut in frustration.

"Did I say _anything_ useful?" I asked, sighing again.

"Bells, you didn't say anything while you were asleep." My eyes snapped open, meeting his with a look of shock and horror. I always spoke in my sleep. It was a given. I didn't even know what it meant if I didn't…

"Hey squirt, it's okay. You were probably just really tired. Too tired to say anything." Emmett soothed, giving my and a squeeze. I looked at him like he had just lost his mind. He knew from years of sharing a bedroom that my talking was directly proportional to how tired I was. He wouldn't meet my eyes, darting his hand out to hit the 'call nurse' button. Mrs. Weber bustled in almost instantly.

"Hello there Bella, feeling more rested and awake? I looked from Emmett to Mrs. Weber. She had the same closed off look in her eyes as him.

_They're keeping something from me._

At first, I was scared. What could be so horrible that they wouldn't tell me? Then anger burned in me, how could they keep something from me? How could they lie to my face? It was bad enough I couldn't remember, now I was being treated like a child.

"I want to be alone." I half-mumbled, half-spat at the two. I was lying through my teeth, I didn't want to be alone, but I certainly didn't want them there if they weren't going to tell me the truth. I turned away, tears stinging my eyes. They didn't argue, didn't say anything, just left. As soon as the door clicked, I let the tears of betrayal flow. I pulled my knees up, laid my forehead on them and sobbed. I felt so alone.

"Bella." I gasped, pulling my head up. Alice was sitting in the chair next to me, looking at her hands. Tears blurred my visionagain. _Not her too._ "Bella," she repeated. I glared at her.

"What?" I seethed.

"What do you want to know?" She was looking at me now. Alice's eyes were clear and unguarded; honest. I must have looked shocked because she gave me a small smile and tapped the side of her head.

_That's right, she's a psychiatrist._ I felt a little foolish. Alice didn't say anything more but handed me a tissue that I scrubbed my eyes with roughly. When I looked back at her, her expression hadn't changed. I took a steadying breath, trying to figure out how I would ask my question. I sighed and settled on being blunt.

"What aren't they telling me?" I asked. Alice paused, probably trying to figure out what to say as well.

"You were screaming and crying in your sleep." She said it so simply, so plainly, I was shocked. We sat there without saying anything for a moment. Then Alice's mask broke. She had the same tortured look that Emmett had. "It was awful. We wanted to sedate you, but Emmett wouldn't let us. He said you wouldn't want it, incase you said a name. He said you wouldn't remember anything when you woke up, but it was so hard…" Her words trailed off, head bowed, fat tears plopping on her clasped hands.

I reached my arms out to wrap around her, ignoring the pain that shot through me, and hugged her tightly. We were crying, holding each other and rocking back and forth. I don't know how long it was, it could have been just minutes or several hours, but eventually our sobs subsided. As we pulled away, I tried to wipe the remaining tears from my eyes. Alice handed me another tissue, taking one for herself. We looked at each other and burst into giggles. Alice's eyes were red and swollen, her hair was a mess, and her nose was running a little. I'm sure I looked even worse.

"Bella, I need you to know something," Alice's voice was soft and a little raspy. I nodded. "I don't usually do this."

"What," I croaked, "you don't normally have major sob sessions with your patients? Are you just PMS-ing or something?" I gave a choked laugh and she smiled at me.

"No, … and probably," Alice laughed. "What I mean is… you're not a patient to me. Bella, you're my friend. You're special. So when you're in pain, I'm in pain." Tears welled up in my eyes again.

"Are you trying to make me cry, Alice?" She laughed.

"God no, I don't think I could handle much more crying in one day. I feel like I'm pregnant."

"Yeah, I know. My emotions have been all over the place. It's like some sort of horrible hormonal rollercoaster."

"I should've warned you about that. Your emotions are going to be all over the place for the next few weeks. It's a result of the trauma and shock. When you start to remember things, you're emotions will be a little crazy too." I was quiet. "Bella? Are you alright?"

"Alice… I'm not sure I _will_ remember." I murmured, she cocked her head to the side.

"Why do you say that?"

"I talk in my sleep. I always have. But this last time… I didn't say anything. What if that means my subconscious can't remember?" Alice frowned, and thought for a moment.

"It's certainly possible, but I doubt it." She paused. "You may not have said anything but you did react. Your mind remembers something. The question is whether or not you will consciously be able to handle those memories. In cases such as yours, that inability is what likely causes the memory loss." I sad there, mulling it over. It made sense, but at the same time, it freaked me out.

"I'm not sure I want to remember though," I admitted. "I know if I do, it will help catch the guy, or girl, or whatever." I waved my hand in dismissal. "But what if I can't handle them, the memories?" Alice nodded.

"Part of you doesn't want to know, wants to hide from the pain. There's also another part of you that needs to know, needs an answer, needs a reason for you to stop looking over your shoulder continually. It torments you…" She trailed off. Her mind was somewhere else.

"You've been through this?" I asked. She shook her head, her eyes meeting mine again.

"Not me. Rose." I was surprised, Rosalie seemed so strong. "That was how we met actually. I was still in school, but she was assigned to me as a patient because we were close in age."

"What happened?"

"You'll have to ask her about that," Alice frowned, then smiled. "Don't worry though, Rosalie likes you." She glanced at her watch. "Actually, I need to get going. I'm sorry that I have to run out on you."

"Got a hot date?" I said cheekily. She blushed and I laughed. "Who is it? Jasper?" I was joking but Alice looked embarrassed. She nodded.

"I've been in love with him ever since I started working here earlier this year. But the silly man can't seem to see all my subtle hints!" She gave an exasperated sigh. I thought back to the limited time I had seen the two together. Once I thought about it, Alice _had_ been sending him signals: the way she angled her body towards his, the way she looked at him when he spoke, the way her eyes sparkled when he said her name… She was right. I laughed at how obtuse he was.

"Wow, he really brings a whole new meaning to dumb blonde."

"I _know_." Alice sighed. "And yet he's so smart… and nice… and handsome—"

"Don't you need to be leaving?" I interrupted. Her eyes widened.

"Got to go, sorry! Bye Bella!" Alice yelled as she ran out the door, I chuckled. _That girl is head over heels._ My heart hurt a little thinking about it. I wanted my own Prince Charming; no matter how clueless he might me. Alice was lucky…

The door opened and a blonde head popped in. I opened my mouth to make a joke that he was going to be late, but it wasn't Jasper—it was Rosalie.

"Hi Rosalie," I called. The uncertainty disappeared from her face and a smile took its place.

"May I come in?" She asked with a hint of humor.

"Of course."

"Great." She said, pushing the door open with her hip, tray in one hand, and a stack of files tucked under the other. As she hastened over to my side, a few files began to slip off the top. I grabbed the tray, allowing her to catch the runaways with her fee hand. "Thanks."

"No problem. Is this for me?" I asked, gesturing to the tray now sitting on the table in front of me.

"Yeah. I managed to get some from the cafeteria before Emmett eats it all." I raised an eyebrow and grabbed the sandwich, taking a bite. "Apparently," she sighed, "the cafeteria ladies have developed a little crush on him. They keep giving him free food. Then he thanks him by giving them kisses on the cheek and flirting." Rosalie rolled her eyes at his antics and I choked a little from laughter. She panicked a little and started to pound my back soundly. I coughed, wincing.

"Ow!" She pulled her hand away quickly.

"Sorry, the guys at the department have this inability to chew while eating…" She muttered, looking embarrassed. I took a sip of juice and smiled at her.

"It's alright, I grew up with Emmett." She looked horrified for a moment, then we both laughed.

"That must have been an experience."

"It still is…" I paused and glanced at the stack of files that were now on the floor next to Rosalie's chair. "So what's in the files?"

"Oh," she looked surprised, then followed my gaze to the stack. "Oh! This," she put the stack on her lap, "is your life."

"My life?" I asked, incredulous. The stack was a good half a foot high.

"Mmhmm. This is everything the department has on you. Of course, some of this is from your family, especially your father." I flinched at the topic of Charlie. She must have noticed because she paused, giving me a deep look. But then her face became neutral again. "My team is currently running down a few leads but I figured you and I could go through these, see if we can jog your memory a little." She smiled. I tried to squash the butterflies of fear in my stomach, smiling back. I needed to do this.

"Alright," Rosalie said, picking a file from the top, "Let's get started."

We started to go through them, reliving my life. She seemed to pick up my reluctance to talk about Renee or Charlie and stepped tactfully around the subject of their deaths. She was a little surprised when she glanced over a file on Emmett's life.

"Emmett served two tours?" I nodded, surprised she didn't know. She did work with him after all.

"Yeah, in Afghanistan."

"Marine Lance Corporal, silver star, honorable discharge. Impressive." I smiled at her amazed expression. I nodded with a smile.

"After his discharge he went to the academy. It's in his blood, I guess."

"Like father like son." She murmured. I ignored the little stab of pain. "Well, he's definitely in the clear. Even without an alibi, I seriously doubt a former marine with this many recommendations could do it anyway." I was relieved that Emmett wasn't a suspect anymore.

"Now, let's see… You got your undergrad in English literature at Portland State and now you're at U Dub getting your masters?"

"Yes," I blushed, "I just finished my first year."

"Any thoughts on a thesis yet?" I shook my head. Rosalie nodded in understanding.

"And you work at… La Granada Bakery and Café?"

"Mmhmm…" I responded absently, then gasped. "Oh shit! Work!" Rosalie laughed at my panic.

"Don't worry. Once we got your name, we informed your boss what was going on. They can't fire you; you're protected by the FMLA." I sighed in relief, collapsing back into the bed.

"Thank god. I can barely afford my rent as is and I'll be busy with school in the fall…" She gave me a look. "What?"

"Bella, Emmett told me he wants you to move in with him, and I think that's a good idea. Your apartment isn't exactly on the safe side of town."

"I can take care of myself." I said with a frown.

"I know you can, Bella." Rosalie placated, taking my hand. "But the next few months are going to be hard. It helps to have someone there, if only to check in every night." I wanted to argue, but I recalled she was speaking from experience.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked shyly.

"Sure, shoot."

"Alice said that you had gone through something like this…" Rosalie took a sharp breath. "I'm sorry, you don't have to tell me anything. I just need to know what I'm supposed to do now." I frowned in frustration, "Where do I go from here?" She nodded absently.

"It's going to be hard. You won't realize how hard right away, it just sneaks up and hits you one day. You'll want to hide. You'll be angry and frustrated. You'll lash out at people then feel terrible for it later. Sometimes you'll feel sorry for yourself, and wonder 'why did this happen to me?'" Rosalie's eyes were far away as she spoke. "It'll hurt to be around people a lot of times. You'll be scared… and you won't trust yourself. But most of all, you'll feel alone." Her eyes met mine again.

"Bella, it's important that you don't isolate yourself. Hiding won't make the feelings go away. Which is why I think you should move in Emmett. For a moment, I sat and thought about her words. They sounded familiar, I had heard them somewhere before…

"They said something similar when Charlie died." I whispered, remembering a conversation from years before.

"Yes, dealing with trauma is very similar to grief. It's just something different that you're grieving for. You've lost your sense of security."

"Will it ever come back?" I asked softly, "Will I ever feel safe again?"

"How do you feel right now? Bella, are you afraid?" I shook my head. "Exactly, but if you were here alone, like when you first woke up, you would be." I nodded, understanding. "It will go back and forth for a long time, but one day, yes, you will feel safe again. But it will never be the same." There was a short rap on the door before Dr. Hale stepped into the room.

"Oh you're still here Rose. I'll come back in a few."

"No, that's alright. I need to get back to the department anyways." Rosalie responded, before giving me a concerned look. "Is that alright Bella? Do you have any more questions?"

"No, you go ahead. I'm just fine." I said with a smile. She smiled back and gathered up her files.

"I'll talk to you later then!" She said, going out the door with a small wave. Dr. Hale stepped through before the door could shut.

"Hello Bella, it's good to see you with a smile on your face." He said with a grin.

"Rosalie is very nice."

"Glad to see a blonde with a gun didn't scare you." I laughed. "I know the first time she came home armed, I got in my car and ran."

"Do you live together then?"

"I used to, while I was in school, she's my sister after all."

"Oh," I said, feeling quite stupid for not making the connection earlier.

"It's alright." He chuckled. "Usually they don't let us work together, but since you're a special case, a few strings were pulled." He said absently while looking over my charts.

"Special case?"

"Alice didn't tell you?" I shook my head. He came over and took a hold of my bad ankle. He pressed on a few spots, "Does this hurt?" I shook my head. "Good. We can take this wrap off now. But I want you to stay of your feet for another day." He marked something on the chart.

"Alice didn't ell me what?" I prodded.

"Oh, right." He was looking at the other cuts and bruises on my legs. "Edward was the one who brought you in. His father, Carlisle, is the dean of medicine and he had us put on the case." I was thoughtful for a moment.

"Does that make you the best doctor in the hospital?" I asked with a sly grin.

"Hardly," he drawled. "But my residency was in the trauma ward—giving me the most experience out of the doctors he trusts. Apart from Edward himself."

"Then why isn't Edward my doctor?"

"What? Don't you like me?" He joked with a wink, I blushed. "To be honest," he continued with a sigh, "Edward doesn't take trauma patients _anymore_. He's a baby man now." There was something odd about how he said 'anymore'. Dr. Hale looked tense; I changed the subject.

"Why would Alice be the one to tell me?" I asked. He motioned me to lay back and pulled the bottom of my shirt up to look at my abdomen. He began pressing gently.

"That's because Edward's her brother." Jasper said casually. I gasped. "Where did it hurt?" he asked worriedly but I shook my head.

"Nothing hurts, but…" I paused so that he was looking at me. "Is everyone in this hospital related?" I asked, biting my lip. He laughed.

"No, of course not. It's really a coincidence. Though in your case, we were asked for specifically." I thought this over; glad I wasn't in some strange soap opera hospital. "Okay, I need you to sit up so I can listen to your lungs." I sat up and he placed his stethoscope on the right side of my chest.

"Big breath Bella." I nodded. I knew the drill. I took a deep breath, wincing in pain as my lungs filled. "Hurts?" I nodded again. "Your lung seems to be healing very well otherwise. I'm surprised it doesn't hurt more." He smiled.

"You seem to be mending quickly. Your ribs look good and your lungs sounds great. The stitches should be ready to take out in another week, and you'll be ready for discharge in a few days." I grinned, excited at the idea of getting out of there.

"But Bella," he added sternly, "I want you resting until, no more wild adventures okay? No matter what Alice says."

"I can't go out in the garden?" I asked sadly.

"You can go out, but I want someone else to go with you as well. Caroline, Rosalie, or myself preferably." I nodded. "Alice seems to be very excited about you and I don't her to get carried away."

"She's a doctor too." I reminded him.

"She has a doctorate, not the same thing."

"I heard that Jasper Whitlock Hale!" Alice was standing in the doorway, hands on her hips. "I had to go to med school too and you know that." She growled.

"Actually, the doctorate program was around long before modern medical doctors were. So technically, Alice is more of a doctor than you." I quipped. Alice clapped her hands in glee while Jasper looked like a kicked puppy.

"She's never going to let that one go." He whined in a whisper.

"Sorry." I whispered back, genuinely feeling sorry for him.

"Hey! Quit with all that whispering you two." Alice huffed, striding over. She ripped my chart out of Jasper's hands with a scowl. "Don't you have some _other_ patients to check on?" She asked with a 'get the hell out of here' look. Jasper sighed dramatically, raising his hands in defeat.

"I guess I'll see you later then Bella. And remember, no adventures." He said. Alice stuck her tongue out at him, but he just shook his head and walked out, shoulders slumped. "Drama queen." She muttered, glancing at the chart. "You're going to be released in three days!" She squealed. I winced at the high pitch.

"I thought he was going to keep you here another week or two." Her face soured, and I worried for Jasper's safety.

"So, how was your 'date'?" I asked tentatively. Alice's face suddenly lit up, I sighed in relief, then her face turned stormy. I was suddenly very nervous.

"It was terrible!" She groaned, flopping in a chair. We went to this nice restaurant and he asked for a private table. I thought he was being romantic, but he thought we were going to talk about you!" She hung her head with a sigh. I couldn't help a giggle.

"He didn't notice you're reaction?" I asked.

"He thought I was upset and worried about you!" She grimaced, "Not that I'm not," she added quickly, I laughed and nodded. "I so frustrated by the time our food came that he had it boxed, thinking I would feel better if I was back here."

It was so sad; I had to feel bad for her.

"I mean, it's not like you're in serious danger here. John's at your door with a tazer he's not afraid to use, Rosalie was here and she holds her department's record in the shooting range, and then there's your crazy military brother who could probably kill a man with his thumb!"

"They did teach him how to do that in the marines." I quipped.

"Exactly!" Alice was practically raving now. "Jasper is usually super attuned to people's feelings, but with me it's like he's out in left field!"

"Poor Jasper," I laughed. "You'll just have to tell him, straight to his face." She groaned.

"I have! And you know what he thought?!" I shook my head. "He thought I meant fraternally and told me that he loved me too. That I was, I quote, 'the best sister a guy could have.'"

"Oh wow," I paused to think for a moment. "Maybe you weren't wearing the right thing." Alice looked at me in confusion.

"Well," I continued, "if you were wearing something slinky and scandalous, something he couldn't possibly misunderstand you in…"

Alice's face was blank for a moment, and then she broke into a dazzling smile.

"Perfect!" She exclaimed with a certain devious glint in her eyes. "And when you get discharged, you're going shopping with me to find the perfect dress!" She got a far off look in her eyes, "And we'll have to stop at Fredrick's, of course, for some new lingerie—"

"Woah, woah, woah!" I said, holding up my hands. "I don't do shopping, especially not for that stuff." I said quickly, a bright blush covering my cheeks. Alice looked crestfallen.

"But I need you Bella! I need your help!" She gave me puppy eyes.

"Wouldn't Rosalie be better?" I asked, biting my lip.

"He's her brother! She won't be able to give me unbiased advice." I hesitated, on the edge of giving in. "Please Bella, I need you."

"Okay." I squeaked, unable to endure her pleading any longer. Alice squealed in delight and for the second time that day, I winced. Somewhere out there, a dog just went deaf.

"This is going to be great! I can't wait! We'll have to get you a dress so we can double. Maybe a nice blue, he does like that color—" She gushed, off in her own little world.

"He being… Edward?" I asked, dryly.

"Of course." She prattled on, "He'd like a darker blue rather than a lighter—" Alice abruptly stopped. "Who told you?"

"Jasper."

"That man, I swear." She muttered, scowling at an imaginary Jasper.

"Alice, were you ever going to tell me?" I asked softly. She looked back at me quickly.

"I'm sorry Bella," she apologized, seeing my expression.

I hadn't really thought about whoever had saved me until Jasper had said something. But now, I wanted to _know_ the person who saved me. A part of me wondered if Edward was the owner of those vivid green eyes. The eyes that had made me feel so safe…

"Bella?" Alice asked, touching my hand. Her worried eyes met mine. " I'm really sorry, I was hoping I could introduce you to him after you got discharged but…"

"It's alright, Alice." I said, squeezing her hand with a wry smile. "I should just be grateful you didn't bring him to see me in this awful state."

"You look beautiful." I scoffed.

"Don't flatter me. I look like hell, I know that." Alice frowned as she looked me over with a glance. I unconsciously lifted a hand to my hair in embarrassment. _My hair!_ My eyes watered. I had been growing out my hair since I was old enough to take care of it myself. Renee had had long hair. I used to look at pictures of her and wish my hair were as beautiful. A few days ago, it had been longer than hers had; now it was patchy and tattered. My hair, Renee's hair, was gone.

"Oh Bella…" Alice said, wrapping her thin arms around me.

"It's just hair." I said bitterly.

"It was a part of you, a part of your identity," she said. "But you need to think of this as an opportunity to start over again; to be a new, stronger version of Bella." I nodded, rubbing my tears away.

"God I hate being so emotional." I muttered. Alice laughed.

"Actually, you're very calm. Most of my patients would be screaming at me right now, then laughing hysterically, then crying their eyes out—all in the space of about a minute. You've known about everything for what? Two days? Moreover, not only are you in control of your emotions, you're listening and talking to others. That's huge." She smiled at me. Suddenly, an alarm went off, scaring me.

"Shoot," she said, fishing her blackberry out of her pocket. "It's late and I have some early appointments tomorrow. I'm sorry Bella…" I waved her off.

"I'm fine," I said. "You need to get your work done. Besides, all this excitement has worn me out." Alice frowned, seeming to have just remembered something.

"Oh!" She reached into her leather bag, "I have a present from Emmett!" I grimaced, remembering the 'surprises' he had given me when we were kids.

"Aha!" She pulled something out and handed it to me. "He grabbed this from his place earlier today." In my hands was my childhood copy of Pride and Prejudice. I had read it so many times it was falling apart. I ran a hand over the faded cover reverently.

"He said to tell you that he's sorry he can't stay with you tonight, but I quote, 'Darcy can keep you warm.'" I laughed.

"Thank you Alice, I really appreciate it." She smiled and stood up.

"Oh, and one more thing," she gave me a kiss on the forehead. "That's from him too." We laughed and I thanked her again. Alice bid me a goodnight and was out the door.

And then it was quiet. I shivered at the sudden emptiness of the room, doubt creeping into my mind.

_They're not coming back…_

_NO!_ I thought angrily, squashing my fears down. I glanced down at the book in my hands and smiled at my old friend. I cracked the book open, carefully holding the loose pages in. Tonight I wouldn't be alone.

Tonight I would be visiting the halls of Pemberley.

* * *

**A/N: **Oh my. I'm so sorry this took so long! Please forgive me!

Was anyone surprised that it was Emmett? I know I had a lot of fun writing some of the exchanges, the "Bella Baloney"/ "Emmie" line and the "Horizontal" line were my favorites. Any favorites?


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